why our new year's resolutions fail, before we even realize it


Yesterday we worked through the sequence we go through when it comes to setting a new habit. And new habits all begin with a simple thought. (THOUGHT > EMOTION > ACTION > RESULTS). 

This time of year is exciting with so many people setting new goals. Looking to better themselves for a happier, more productive year. But every year we all seem to end up in the same place...

It is as if December 31st sneaks up on us without warning. Without any regard for our emotional wellbeing. All of a sudden, the year comes to an end - and we are left wondering what happened to so many of those intentions we had set at the start of the year. 

Like with most things, we have good intentions when the year begins - but then life happens - throwing a wrench into our carefully laid plans. 

I wanted to dig a little bit deeper into what we discussed yesterday, in the hopes that maybe it will shed some light on why so many of us fall short when it comes to keeping new habits, and achieving goals. 

In the chaotic world we live in, we are usually walking around in a reactionary state. We are too busy to think and respond to everything we come in contact with. So we muster up the quickest reaction we can find. 

Most of us operate in this reactive state when it comes to our thoughts as well. We react all day long to our subconscious mind. And our subconscious controls our beliefs and habits. 

To put this more simply - so many of the things you do without thinking on a daily basis, are already ingrained into your mind as habits. Same goes for your beliefs. Often times we think and act a certain way because of the beliefs that are deeply ingrained into our subconscious. 

So much of our day to day life runs on auto pilot, without us even realizing it. 

If we want to change a habit, we have to first start with our mind. Once we become aware of our reactionary state, we can choose to respond, rather than react. 

Once we learn to respond, we can begin to change our habits. Changing these habits on a deeper level will help shift our beliefs and eventually our reality. 

One of the best ways to start reacting rather than responding - is to simply slow down. Exercise a little daily mindfulness.

Start with the words that come out of your mouth. Every spoken word first starts with a thought. Before you speak, take a deep breath. While you are breathing, take a split second to go over the statement that is about to come out of your mouth - and ask yourself why?

Often times, when we take just a second to investigate what we are actually about to say, it can stop us dead in our tracts. We may be saying things we don't mean - or don't even realize. 

This is step one in learning to respond, rather than react.

Give it a shot this week, and see what information you can gather. You may be surprised how little awareness you have for even the words that come out of your mouth on a daily basis.